Monday, 17 October 2016

Emotional Safety Tool Kit

I had a really good session with my Psych Estelle today. I often think even if we met randomly she would be a good friend to have. She's a lot older then I am but is always so understanding and very empathetic. I nearly cried with joy when she said she really loves working with people with BPD especially as she learns so much about herself. Its so nice to hear that and feel like we do belong in society even though sometimes I feel like I don't fit in. I also had a special friend come and see me and she bought me a milkshake. I like her company so much because I can just be myself and she doesn't ask me to be different and she validates how I feel. Having people like that in my life helps me majorly.

She suggested something I took from the session to make an Emotional safety kit. Some things I can turn to when I want to self harm or escape the pain. I tend to start hurting myself because in that mind frame I think of myself so poorly so I take full responsibility, even though I wasn't at fault.

I spoke out on Facebook for some good things to write down about myself when I am feeling that low. So I can turn to the book and read all these nice things people think of me even though I struggle to think like that of myself. I think this will be a big breaking point for me to keep moving forward. I also watched an interview today that inspired me a lot. I shouldn't view my giving and loving traits as bad just because someone wasn't able to see how good it could of been for them and what I have to offer.

I made a playlist to start for my emotional safety tool kit. All these songs I have put on here have a lot of meaning and if you want to look at it the link will be below. I know music is one of my biggest outlets and is so personal to me.

I am sure I will have a day of anger and pain again that will come again. I have out stuff into practice.

Here is the playlist

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